Anticipation

Tonight I am full of anticipation. Isn’t that an incredible word? Anticipation.
Anticipation is when you look forward to something. When it is something awesome, your stomach flutters a bit with excited energy, you get a skip in your step, and a bright smile on your face. At least that’s how I define it.

Then I started to wonder if I even knew the actual definition, so I checked. Merriam Webster defines it as the “act of looking forward with pleasurable expectation.”

That’s about right.

Today has been a great day of anticipation. I started the day anticipating how much I wanted to make my oldest daughter’s birthday special (the end of birthday season!). More pancakes and candles! Giving her presents I hope she loves!

I anticipated seeing a special friend today and enjoyed a great cup of coffee and conversation.

And, tonight, I anticipate taking a trip tomorrow. A trip back in time to Fayetteville, Arkansas. My alma mater. The University of Arkansas.

What’s the occasion? A track team reunion!

I loved college. Simply loved it. Would go back and do it again in a heartbeat. Who knew how luxurious that schedule was in the moment? Living with your best girlfriends. Dancing ‘til dawn. Watching TV shows with piles of friends. Oh, and learning a bit too.

For me, it was such a time of transition. I grew up in a small town in Missouri – around 10,000 people. Fayetteville had around 70,000 people and felt MASSIVE. There was a MALL!! And our choice of restaurants. And multiple movie theaters. I loved the campus. I loved the people.

And I made the best friends. I was very sheltered in high school. Very focused on running and incredibly straight-laced. That changed relatively quickly. My best friends were my teammates and many of them were much older than me. I was small and young, and fit the little sister mold perfectly. They did their very best to show me the ropes, get me into clubs with the most ridiculous fake IDs, and show me a lovely time. This picture pretty much sums it up (and yes, those are some seriously high-waisted jeans).

It was a unique experience. Since we were all runners, we traveled frequently (when I wasn’t injured anyway). So on top of living in the big city of Fayetteville, I traveled with my best friends to races all over – California, Arizona, Florida, Pennsylvania, Texas and more. We spent many nights together in hotel rooms, saved our per diem money for meals and blew it at the mall on trendy clothes, and of course, raced our hearts out.

Here is a pic of some of my old track team. In addition to high-waisted jeans, I had an affinity for scrunchies.

More important were the everyday things. Hanging out at various apartments or on campus. Singing poorly to our favorite songs. Planning the next big night out. Making mix tapes to be our soundtracks. Going to coffee shops to do homework. And mostly talking – talking, talking, talking – about nothing and everything.

Tomorrow will be the first time I’ve been back to Fayetteville since I left over 20 years ago. I finished school a semester early in the winter and didn’t even attend the actual graduation ceremony in the spring because I was living in Oregon.

I cannot wait to see my old stomping grounds. I cannot wait to see some of the best friends I’ve ever had. I cannot wait to run in my alumni t-shirt at the cross-country festival on Saturday. I cannot wait to hit the town for a few nights and go back to this magical time.

The thing about anticipation is that it can set you up for disappointment. I know Fayetteville has changed a bunch. I’m sure my friends and I have too. It definitely won’t be the same.

But I am anticipating a great week-end – I cannot wait!